How to Recognize Red Flags in the Dating World
The world of dating can be exciting, scary, exhilarating, and overwhelming — sometimes all at once. Whether you’re just jumping back into the dating pool after getting over a breakup or you’ve been in the game for a while, it’s easy to start feeling frustrated when the dates don’t go as planned or healthy relationships don’t come as a result.
One of the best ways to enjoy a healthier dating experience is to be able to recognize red flags.
It’s a myth that you have to wait until you’re in a committed, long-term relationship to see potential problems with a partner. While most people tend to put their best foot forward while dating, it’s not hard to see their true colors fairly quickly.
So, how can you recognize red flags in the dating world?
Dishonesty
If someone isn’t being honest with you from the start, even telling small white lies, be careful. Honesty builds trust and that’s essential for a healthy relationship. This is one of those “trust your gut” things that can tell you a lot about a person very early on.
Maybe they’ve lied about details of their past relationships. Maybe they’ve stretched the truth about where they work or what they do. They even might’ve lied about why they were late to one of your dates. If they’re that comfortable making up stories about “little things,” they probably wouldn’t hesitate to lie about things that could have a huge impact on a relationship.
A Lack of Presence
There’s no question that we live in a busy, and sometimes chaotic, world. But, if someone you’re dating seems constantly distracted or downright uninterested in what you’re doing together, don’t fight to keep things going.
You deserve someone who will be present on dates. That means giving you their full attention, engaging in conversation, and not spending every second looking at their phone or getting distracted by your surroundings. If someone can’t be present with you, you’re not likely to have meaningful conversations with them.
How They Treat Others
You can learn a lot about a person by how they treat the people around you — especially wait staff and people serving you or helping you in some way. They might be putting on a friendly act for you. But, if they’re unpleasant to a waiter, that’s a sign of their true colors. It might suggest that they think they’re better than others. Or, it might suggest that they have a hidden temper that could eventually be taken out on you.
Leading You On
In the dating world, there’s a phrase called “breadcrumbing.” It occurs when someone is essentially stringing another person along with no real intentions of a relationship.
Breadcrumbing can be hard to spot at first. You can be so distracted by the idea of a new relationship that you don’t realize the person is leading you on. But, if they keep canceling dates or making excuses, or they don’t respond to you for days only to text or call when you least expect it, they could be stringing you along at their own convenience.
Not only is this unhealthy, but it can potentially let that person know how much control they’ll have in your relationship. That kind of control can easily be abused. They might be testing the waters to see how much they can push things with you.
Unfortunately, these are only a few of the red flags you should be looking out for in the dating world. Don’t be afraid to trust your gut, and stick to your values as you date. Keep a firm understanding of what you want and what you deserve. In doing so, you’re less likely to settle for someone who isn’t good for you.
Next Steps
If you’re having trouble recognizing red flags or are struggling with your current relationship, we’re here to help. Reach out today to schedule your first session!
